A Guide To Smoking Weed Discretely At Work

Popular culture in the form of films and music might have you believing the false notion that all stoners are all lazy couch dwellers, or that just a few puffs off a “marijuana cigarette” is enough to utterly paralyse you for the rest of the day. If you’re worried about being rendered useless and unable to complete a productive shift, this is hardly the case. Although some people are without a doubt lazier than others, such a generalisation cannot be placed upon every weed smoker. In fact, many stoners are extremely functional individuals and sometimes even more productive after they enjoy a portion of a blunt or take a quick bong rip!

Those who function well while high, along with those who depend upon cannabis for conditions like anxiety and depression might be interested in exploring a variety of tips and techniques to consume this magical, medicinal herb at work. Doing so may offer you the newfound creativity you need to better contribute to your role. What’s more, some find weed to ease their anxiety and stress, or just help them get through the day at a job they thoroughly do not enjoy.

IS YOUR JOB SUITABLE?

Let us explore a few factors to consider when planning to smoke weed at work. But before we do so, it is important to get real in regards to this topic. In all honestly, it is highly unlikely that most employers will tolerate cannabis at work and, if discovered doing so, you may risk being fired from a position. Obviously, some jobs, like those that require the operation of potentially dangerous machinery or other forms of unadulterated attention are absolute “no-no’s” when it comes to smoking weed on the job.

If your job happens to be fairly high pressure or fast paced, such as in a sales environment with strict targets and high demands, then perhaps smoking weed at work is not right for you. On the other hand, for some it might be the perfect solution to relax, yet perform more efficiently. Could rocking up to work half stoned be something that your work mates might report you for? In certain American states such as California and Colorado, being discovered smoking weed at work might be far less damaging to their career than if it occurred within a region still under prohibition.

DRUG TESTING

Another huge factor to consider, and one that is fairly obvious, is whether or not your place of work conducts routine drug tests. It is one thing to turn up stoned to and manage to hide it and another thing entirely to try and pass a drug test. For the covert and strategic, it is possible to “pass” such a screening, but for those not willing to go the distance, it is better to be far more mindful about smoking cannabis.

So with those factors addressed, let us explore numerous ways that you can smoke weed discreetly at work, without getting caught!

OPT FOR SATIVA STRAINS

As many frequent weed smokers are familiar with, there are a lot of different strains of cannabis available on the market. Many offer different types of effects than others due to varying concentrations of cannabinoids, terpenes and other chemicals constituents that influence physiological outcomes.

The main criteria when choosing a strain to smoke is whether or not it is indica or sativa. To put things in rather simple terms, indica cannabis is usually associated with a “stoned” sensation that is anecdotally reported to makes users feel extremely relaxed, heavy and often quite tired and sleepy. It is evident that this is not an optimal state to be in during a work day where hopes for productivity and success are high.

On the other end of the spectrum are sativa strains. Sativa-dominant cannabis is usually associated as somewhat of a foil to indicas, as it encourages a boost in creativity with a cerebral and buzzy high that is capable of increasing energy and even sociability.

Of course, preferences change on an individual basis, and many strains contain elements from both indica and sativa varieties, also known as hybrids. But based on this simple observation, it is easy to conclude that if you are going to smoke weed at work, it is probably in your best interest to go with a Sativa.

USE A VAPE PEN

Vape pens can be used to consume weed at work and blend in at the same time. Vaporizers are becomingly increasingly popular at replacing cigarettes. Therefore, you are likely not to raise any suspicions when choosing this device as a means to consume cannabis. Although the sweet and pungent aromas are still detectable when inhaling through a vape pen, they are far less obvious than the smoke generated from firing up a joint. Furthermore, vapor won’t linger in the fibers of your clothes or car like a blunt would.

USE A ONE-HITTER

If you don’t happen to own a vape pen, or simply dislike using them, another great option would be to use a “one-hitter”. Evidenced by its name, this method presents a stealthy way to smoke a small amount of weed one hit at a time. Most of these pipes literally look like cigarettes, and as long as you are a fair distance away and out of smelling range, then it looks like you are engaging in a perfectly legal act.

TAKE BREAKS

Considering that you work long days, you will be given a certain amount of time during a shift to take breaks for food, coffee and smoking. These represent the optimal times to go for a quick nature walk or head straight to your parked car for a quick blaze. This toking experience will likely be preferable to nervously hitting the bowl during a quick toilet break. Actual breaks in the day give the smoker a chance to eat some food, wash down each toke with a drink and just chill into the moment. Taking a vape pen or one-hitter on a walk in a secluded area will also help to remove the odour as much as possible.

FIND A SUITABLE SPOT

Smoking weed in the employee smoking area might not be the best idea when it comes to keeping your consumption on the secret side. Maybe there is an area near your building that nobody really visits that can become your hidden smoking spot. For the more daring among us, perhaps there is an old abandoned toilet or bathroom in the building with good ventilation that could serve this purpose.

USE EYE DROPS

It is no secret that smoking weed can cause a person's eyes to appear red and bloodshot. There are a variety of products on the market that claim to remedy this. It would be wise to use them if you wish to remain completely covert.

Adam Parsons

Professional cannabis journalist, copywriter, and author Adam Parsons is a long-time staff member of Zamnesia. Tasked with covering a wide range of topics from CBD to psychedelics and everything in between, Adam creates blog posts, guides, and explores an ever-growing range of products.

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